Whose Table for the Retarded

Stanley Hauerwas’s reflection on community and diversity challenges us to confront the “tyranny of normality” and rethink how we build inclusive communities. ​ His talk, delivered to parents and workers supporting people with intellectual disabilities, calls for a deeper conviction to embrace difference and resist the temptation to segregate or normalize those who carry frightening differences. ​ While Hauerwas acknowledges the gifts people with intellectual disabilities bring, his account feels thin, focusing largely on their impact on parents rather than their active contributions to community life. ​

Jean Vanier’s work offers a richer perspective, emphasizing the transformative power of shared life and friendship between disabled and non-disabled people. ​ Vanier’s communities reveal the struggles, imperfections, and joys of living together, where weakness and need become pathways to deeper connection. ​ This contrasts with Hauerwas’s outsider stance, which seems to limit his vision of a more expansive “us” that includes people with intellectual disabilities as active participants. ​

Hauerwas’s caution about normalization is prudent, recognizing its potential to strip away identity and history in pursuit of an illusory normality. ​ Yet, the principle of normalization, when rooted in honest efforts, has sometimes fostered diverse communities where people learn from each other. ​ The Spirit works even through flawed systems, creating conditions for friendships that move us closer to true community. ​

Ultimately, building good communities requires us to confront dependence, dissolve fear of difference, and make room for the Spirit’s transformative work. ​ It’s about setting more places at the table and embracing the gifts of all, especially those who challenge our illusions of self-sufficiency. ​